"You realise you are not alone, right? No one in their twenties has life figured out. It’s okay to be a mess. You’re living."
What should I do…
I worked with this guy who’s become a really good friend in a relatively short space of time, because since September he’s been giving me a lift to and from work every day and we got pretty close through that…
everyone who doubts the existence of sexism should be like required by law to read this book it’s just so so eye opening even to people like me who’s eyes were already pretty open
Must buy this soon!
turns out my friend who asked if it’d be weird if he kissed me when we went out a few weeks ago does remember saying that (I assumed he just didn’t remember because he didn’t mention it and it wasn’t awkward or anything), because he brought it up last night. We were out for my leaving ‘do, because it was my last day at work yesterday. He asked if I remembered him asking and I said I’d assumed that HE hadn’t remembered, so he obviously said he did but he couldn’t remember how I’d responded, so I said “well you asked if it’d be weird and I just kept saying I didn’t know!”, and then I think he asked again if it would be weird… But, again, he didn’t actually try and nothing happened. Basically he said that if we hadn’t been sharing a car every day (he’s been driving me to and from work) he definitely would’ve hit on me, and then he was saying how amazing I am and that he’ll really miss me. And I just kept laughing, and hugging him, and I didn’t know what to say. So then we went to dance, and some girl started dancing with him, and I felt a bit rubbish and left to find my other friend. Ended up not speaking to him again after that confusing conversation cos he was with that girl when we left and he didn’t share a taxi back with us. So I just don’t know… this stuff only comes out when we’re drunk. I guess we probably need to talk about it properly and soberly? I hate being confused like this! I just wish I knew how I felt about him.
I ACTUALLY CANNOT WAIT TO LIVE ALONE SO I CAN FILL MY FRIDGE WITH HEALTHY FOOD AND EAT THAT WAY EVERYDAY AND KEEP MY HOUSE ALL CLEAN AND PUT PRETTY FLOWERS AND STUFF IN IT OMG
This is how I felt, and now I do live alone and I’m lazy and it’s messy and I have a plant but no flowers… but it is a really nice flat and I love living by myself :)
So, last night was weird.
Really really fun, but weird! Though the friend I planned to go out with was too ill to visit in the end, another friend still came and a couple of friends from work too. We drank a LOT, and still went to this club I love like we originally planned and had such a good night :) Except… my friend from work, who’s genuinely become one of my best friends and I have been spending a lot of time with him recently, randomly said “I feel like I want to kiss you, is that weird?” while it was just the two of us on the dancefloor. It was completely out of the blue. I just said “…I don’t know”. And nothing did happen. Which I’m glad about, because I do not want it to get awkward or complicated between us. But I feel like if he had kissed me I would’ve kissed him back. So now I’m just really confused. But I’m probably making it a bigger deal than it is… cos it could mean nothing, just a random fleeting drunken thought. I dunno.
Self-pity and a box of wine…
this could end badly. Ha.
Jeez I’ve had such a crappy week, and I was so looking forward to tonight cos my friend was visiting and we were gonna drink wine and make cocktails and go to this club we love and used to go to a lot. But she’s just said she’s had to turn back on the train cos she’s too ill. Obviously not at all her fault, but I can’t help being really disappointed. There’s honestly no point in me ever planning anything ever because it never works out.
Saw one of these things for the USA. decided we needed an english version.
Hampshiiiiiiire love ♡ And West Mids :P